If you had told me a year ago that I’d sell my house in Georgia, load up my two dogs, and drive across the country to start a brand-new job in California—all in 3 months—I probably would have laughed and said, “That sounds like something other people do, not me.”
But here I am. Living proof that sometimes the scariest decisions are the ones that expand your life the most.
In your 50s, there’s a script you’re “supposed” to follow. Slow down. Get comfortable. Maybe coast a little. But deep down, I wasn’t ready to coast—I was restless, asking myself the big question: What’s next?
When a job opportunity in California came my way, it wasn’t just about work. It was about possibility. Reinvention. Writing my own chapter instead of following someone else’s.
Of course, my inner critic had plenty to say:
If you’ve ever had that voice in your head, you know how convincing it can sound. Like it has facts on its side. But what I’ve learned—through experience and through the ideas and exercises that are embedded throughout the Cultivating a Growth Mindset Workbook — is that these thoughts aren’t truths. They’re just limiting beliefs dressed up as certainty.
The ideas and concepts in the section in the Rewiring That Inner Critic section became my anchor. It reminded me that reframing thoughts isn’t about ignoring fear—it’s about challenging it.
So I practiced, daily, flipping the script:
Some days those reframes felt like flimsy sticky notes taped over a wall of doubt. But saying them, writing them, choosing them—over and over—helped me keep moving forward.
Let’s be real: it wasn’t all Eat, Pray, Love montages and golden sunsets. Some days were messy, emotional and exhausting—boxes everywhere, letting loose an ugly cry or two, dogs barking at strangers at rest stops, me muttering to myself somewhere outside Albuquerque, “What on earth am I doing?”
But other days? Exhilaration. Driving west, horizon wide open, I felt possibility stretching out in front of me. I wasn’t just starting a new job; I was choosing a new life.
And no, not every day since has been sunshine and roses (though California weather sure helps). Some days doubt still sneaks in. But every day feels like an invitation—to grow, to learn, to lean into what’s possible.
Here’s the thing about silencing your inner critic: you’ll also have to deal with outer critics. Not everyone will understand your choices. Some may even tell you you’re making a mistake.
That’s where support systems matter. Friends, family, mentors—and yes, my two pups—carried me through moments when my own belief wavered. Their encouragement bridged the gap until I could stand more firmly on my own.
Looking back, I see now that the tools in this workbook aren’t just exercises. They were lifelines. They gave me the courage to trade self-doubt for possibility, to say yes to the new opportunity, to pack up my belongings, drive cross-country, and start fresh.
Reframing my inner critic didn’t erase fear—it gave me the clarity to act in spite of it. And that’s what growth really looks like.
So here I am, Kim, founder of Total U Living, with two dogs by my side, the best friend a girl could ask for and a growth mindset in my pocket—living proof that it’s not too late, and you’re never too old, to start again.
And if I can reframe my way across the country? Maybe it’s time your inner critic took a backseat too.
If this resonated with you, know this, you don’t have to take on your inner critic alone. At Total U Living, we’ve created the Cultivating a Growth Mindset Workbook because I know firsthand how powerful these tools can be when life hands you a big decision – or even when if just hands you a hard day.
Your next chapter is waiting. The only question is: will you let your inner critic drive, or will you take the wheel? (and yes, that was in honor of Carrie Underwood’s Jesus Take the Wheel being 20 years old!)